I was listening to a video where a brother was talking about his girl getting him drunk and having sex with him for the express purpose of getting pregnant, even though they discussed it beforehand and he told her very explicitly that he wasn’t interested in being a father. I do believe this is coerced rape in that regard (she manipulatively used alcohol while misrepresenting her status, pretending to be drunk). But my question is, is “sperm jacking,” “spurgling,” “motherhood by theft,” or “sperm theft” (an Israeli concept) a form of rape?
Many of the articles I found about this discussed it but didn’t classify it as a form of rape—and stressed the difficulty in proving it even if it were. If anything they classified it in terms of whether or not a man can be held liable for child support (which is a valid question btw), but not whether or not the violation of trust and the use of his coerced sperm to produce a pregnancy was a violation of him in any way. In other accounts, some women have secured sperm though oral sex and kept it to impregnate themselves with it, or secured it by fishing recently used condoms, or even through coercive means such as sleep rape or use of drugs and alcohol. On moral terms, I do think it a violation, and believe the use of it to produce a pregnancy should be classified as a form of something on par with rape, but it might require new language. Just as “made to penetrate” had to be created to account for experiences of sexual violation that were previously ignored, particularly in regard to men, producing a pregnancy from a man’s coerced sperm should have a new classification. Hmm…going to ponder this one.
In the meantime, fellas…PLEASE stay in as much control as possible regarding your bodies and your sperm. As it stands, relatively speaking, few care (and by that I include the law) about what happens to you in contrast to women’s violations. Protect yourselves. Take nothing too lightly. And maintain your faculties at all times… After all, sperm is something that can be produced well into old age, be careful around those who may have designs on it at your expense… You are not required to give sperm because a woman is adamant about wanting it…or threatens to withhold sex if you won’t…tries to get you high or drunk…or misrepresents her use of contraceptives (or lack thereof) to get it. Be careful stay vigilant. In this economy, you have no idea how many hussles people are running to secure resources.